Ik Ben Ik

How do you know you’re with the right person if you don’t know yourself?

How do you know you’re in the right job if you
don’t know what you’re meant to be doing?

How do you know you’re living your best life if you don’t know your potential?

How do you know you’re in the right place if you don’t know where you come from?

How do you know you’re on the right track if you don’t know where you’re going?

Ik Ben Ik (I am I) is a gentle yet rigorous journey of self-discovery. All we need is curiosity, honesty, and an openness to new and interesting ideas—we will practice together in telling our story truthfully, discovering our life-language and values that guide us, and listening daily to our inner voice as we become our true selves. 

Ik ben Ik (I am I) is a Personal Discovery course in three modules that helps us –

  • make sense of our lives so far
  • see more clearly our light and shadow
  • cultivate and practice an unconditional self-love that frees us to be ourselves
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The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.

Who is it for?

It should be for everyone, because it is for anyone…

For anyone who realises that we are more than the sum of our parts – more than the roles we play, more than the things we do and say

For anyone who realises that the world we see is coloured and shaped by our own perspectives – we are as we see the world

For anyone curious to learn more about our world, our existence, our meaning and purpose in this life

For anyone ready to swap performance and projection for radical honesty, self-compassion, and deep authenticity – you will feel at home here

What’s in it for me? (I hear you ask)

  • Greater Clarity. Of our past, present, and future selves
  • Deeper Insight. Into our light and shadow, and recurring unconscious behaviour
  • More Self-Awareness. Of who we are to ourselves and others
  • More Self-Confidence. In who we are and what we are here to do
  • Increased Security. In no longer needing recognition or applause from others
  • Better Practices. A way to employ all our senses as we venture forward into life
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How it works

1. Our story. Who am I?

We are now not only the author but also the main character in our own life story

We will map out our memories, good, bad, and ugly

We will notice how our perspectives are shaped and will shape everything

We will meet and make peace with the ghosts that tug at our conscience

Exercise – The life line frequency (our story)

A visual 7-year-cycle chart that uncovers memories and meaning, helping us turn our history into an honest, compassionate story we can use going forward

2. Our being. What do I stand for?

We will move from the perspectives we see to our core values and beliefs

We will explore consciousness, emotion, and morality without the dogma

We will define, evaluate, and determine what values we hold most dear

We will distil our core values into those that most uniquely define who we are

Exercise – The core values eye

Choose from 52 values and distil them into non-negotiables (pupil), negotiables (iris), and the preferences (sclera). The result is a unique kaleidoscope of who we are

3. Our becoming. How do I keep becoming?

We will learn to trade self-improvement for self-acceptance on a daily basis

We will practice being uniquely perfect, even with our imperfections

We will experiment with what flows from who we are, not what is imposed upon us

We will find self-discovery is a motivating force for good, for ourselves and for others

Exercise – Listening journey stepping stones

52 sensory, emotional, physical, and social micro adventures (from breathing, to meditation, to sensory, to visual) to help us ‘listen’ deeply, with our whole being, to who we truly are

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Our ethos

Perspectives matter

Where we come from has shaped our perspectives, as our perspectives will shape where we are going – to become truly ourselves is to learn that our past, present, and future are now.

Words matter

We each have our own unique life-language in every aspect of how we experience ourselves, the world, and others. Deeper meaning emerges when we discover our voice and learn how to choose our own words.

Vulnerability is strength

Understanding and owning our light and shadow. To be free from anything that prevents us from being truly ourselves. To find confidence in being more than enough.

Perfect Makes Practice

We do not practice to become more – we practice to become who we truly are.

What happens next?

Although each module looks at our past, present, and future selves, there is no correct way to complete the course. It really is up to us where we start and where we finish

To become part of a journey of discovery, not a destination – There are no solutions to the human condition, only a lifetime of never-ending adventures and discoveries

We will find a community of self-explorers for sharing and encouragement – To become who we truly are is not a solo adventure, we’ll meet many fellow travellers along the way

We can be completely honest, especially with ourselves – There is no judgment to fear, from anyone, including ourselves, only self-acceptance to embrace and to give

We can complete the course in our own time and to set our own expectations – There is no one-size-fits-all – we are all unique, with uniquely different experiences and outcomes

To be free from deadlines and to complete the modules at our own pace – There are no impositions, only invitations. Now is a good time.

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We have written this course in the plural first person because we strongly believe that we are, and always will be, with you on this same journey of self-discovery, in all its exhilarating, illuminating, and challenging adventures.

Exert from Module One – Our Story (Thinking)

The Story of Everything

Does coming from Amsterdam or Seoul, Baghdad or Bermuda, make a difference to how we perceive the world and ourselves? Most of us would say, of course it does. The saying it takes a village to raise a child, and in turn, it takes somewhere to become the person we are.

Whether it’s a bottle of vintage wine, or the apples in our supermarket trolley, the car we are considering buying, or the phone in our pocket – how often do we consider their story?

What are the materials or ingredients involved? Whose hands have they passed through? Everything has an origin story and a journey to our encounter with it. Their very existence is a marvel; let alone the story they could tell us. And what about our journey to now?  

For some people, every purchase they make includes at least some understanding of the story of that product. This is especially true if we bring an ecological, economic or aesthetic eye to our decisions. Sometimes we’ll have a partisan view, for a brand or a team, a political party even. How often have we looked at the story of the party or politicians we prefer?

The story of everything is rooted in truth-seeking, in understanding that all things exist with a journey to now. If we can know the truth of that motor vehicle, we would consider the twenty thousand or more parts that go into its assembly, where and how each component is made and by whom; all those plastics, minerals and metals coming together, the processes they have gone through, and so on to almost incomprehensible proportions. We can only imagine the truth of that thing we call a car. The same is true for our food, our clothes, and everything we utilise or encounter. The truth of a person is no different.

Of course, we are not omniscient beings; our limitations as mere mortals for conscious knowledge means we can never fully know the story of everything, or perhaps fully understand anything, including ourselves, at least in our lifetime.

What we can do, however, is become conscious of the story of things and the people we encounter in everyday life. We might recognise that they and we are much more fascinating and wonderful than we or anyone could imagine too. The very pen that we write with has a story all its own. And yes, so do all of us.

Perhaps in our unconsciousness, we can know the whole story of ourselves….

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